Chief Ololiuhqui was happy with the Governor’s offer of Obama Care
for all the Indians and a proper holiday honoring Chief Sitting Bull. After
Hairy and he smoked the peace pipe (a fine cigar) Hairy and his mule started
back down the mountain. He was about half way down when his satellite phone
started ringing. Hairy was surprised to see on his caller I.D. screen that the
caller was his old friend, Warren Buffet. “Hello Warren, how can I help you?’
Warren said, “I think you are the only person in the world that can help me.”
Hairy said, “Thanks for the complement but tell me what’s happening.” Well, to
begin with the President has managed to piss off all our, ‘used to be’, allies
and completely screwed up the launching of his Health Care program. And he has
managed to increase the federal debt ceiling which puts us in danger of future
bankruptcy.” Hairy said, “Yeah, I know all about that stuff but its old news.
Tell me what’s really got you riled up.” Warren said, “Okay, but you had better
sit down on your mule before I tell you the shocking news.”
Hairy said, “ I’m ready. Go ahead.” Warren said, “A country has
declared war against the United States!” “Holy shit; who is it?” “The name of the country is Tuvalu and their
Capital city is Funafuti.” Hairy said, “Never heard of em. Where they located?”
“It is a tiny island country located in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.” Hairy
said, “That doesn’t sound like much of a threat. Do they have an army, a navy,
and an air force?” Warren said, “They have a police department, a fishing boat,
and a runway that hasn’t been used since WW2.” “So what’s the problem”, said
Hairy. Warren said, They claim to have a secret weapon which will destroy
America if we don’t give in to their demands.” Hairy said, “So you want me to
go over there to see what demands they have and try to find out what their
secret weapon is, right? Warren said, “You got it. I knew I could count on you”
To
be continued…
Sunset on Fongafale island, Tuvalu.
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