Wednesday, March 9, 2011

IN HONOR OF FAT TUESDAY

A friend of mine has a theory about why Americans are overweight. It makes so much sense and made me feel so good that I am going to share it with you. With time, we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren’t heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy. Now, when I look at my backside in the mirror, I think, good grief, look how smart I am!

So you see, we do not eat too much. We just have information overload. Doesn’t that make you feel better? We need to cut down on information and maybe exercise a little more. The smartest man I ever did know was Victor Buono. He said, “Show me the light that I may bear witness, To the President’s Council on Physical Fitness.

I had my paczki; did you have yours?

3 comments:

  1. They call them Fastnacht on Fastnachts Tuesday here in Pennsylvania Dutch land. I don't eat them; they're way too heavy on the stomach if not the brain.
    But the great Tsar disagrees with your friend. I'm just fat, and rather than give up David Brooks, I should give up desserts.
    Fat chance.
    TsarPat

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  2. But wait, you can't disagree with my friend because you are my friend who I quoted! One of us (or both of us) is (or are) confused. We may have loaded up on too much information.

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  3. The Tsar is great because he can hold two opposed arguments in his head and use either one with equal facility (if not supreme insouciance). However, the advance of age has limited his ability to remember which he has used or where. The Tsar warrants only that his arguments are supremely proffered but not that they are germane in context. The Tsar insists that in this he is only following in the great traditions of politicians everywhere.
    TsarPat

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