Lakopa Italeli withdrew Tuvalu’s declaration of war
against the United States and thanked Hairy for helping him to understand the
controversial issue of Global Warming. They shook hands and Hairy left in
peace. As his jet cleared the end of the runway, he called Warren to inform him
there was nothing to worry about. Warren
expressed gratitude but said, “The NSA Director has been trying to reach you.
You better give him a call. Hairy said to himself, “good grief, what, now?”
The NSA Director is a busy man with heavy
responsibilities. Only a few people in the world have access to him; Hairy is one of them. Disguised as an insurance agent, he is their top secret agent,
the only one licensed to tap dance. The Director’s alias is Patrick Dennis
Fero. No one knows his real name. He is a tall, handsome man with an I Q that is off the charts. He and Hairy are both Chess Grand Masters and enjoy fighting to a draw, occasionally. Patrick picked up the phone after the first
ring and said, “Where the hell ya been?” Hairy said, “You know damn well where
I been. After all, you are the one who put a miniature GPS transponder up my
ass.” “Oh yeah, I forgot about that.”
Patrick had an amazing story to tell. Hairy listened
carefully. Forbes magazine called Vladimir Putin the most powerful man in the
world but Patrick said he was only a figurehead. He is a puppet under the
control of the President of the Republic of Belarus, Alexander Lukypinko. Mr.
Lukypinko is the hidden Tsar of the communist world. He is the architect of a
devious plan to transform the United States into a new world order of
communism. To accomplish his goal, he is using an undercover communist agent by
the name of President Obama! Obama has been instructed to keep borrowing money
until the U.S. becomes bankrupt. Then, the communist can easily take over the
country and begin spreading the wealth. Hairy exclaimed, “That dirty puke!
Whada ya want me to do?” “Go on a ‘vacation’ to Belarus; get into a position
where you can tap dance on this bastard.”
To
be contined…
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