CHAPTER EIGHT

Hairy knew that the only way to create a hidden force for good was to enlist the help of God. He imagined a meeting with God to discuss it. Since God is “all knowing”, he figured that this would be his best shot at communicating with the “all powerful one”. Whatever Hairy imagined, God would have to be aware of it. So Hairy imagined a meeting in which he proposed that the gift of free will be modified to limit the actions of humans to only good acts and not allow any evil acts.

Hairy told the All Mighty, “Because, by definition, you are a logical entity you should be able to see the sense of modifying free will to eliminate evil but continue to allow people to have the free will to choose to love, or not love you. God would continue to have the pleasure of the willing love of some humans and the rest he could send to hell. The awful evil on earth would be eliminated to the joy of mankind. Now doesn’t that make a lot of sense? And would it not prove that God is good?”

Hairy’s imagined God said, “Yes it does make sense. I will think it over and let you know next week whether or not I will modify free will.”

To be continued…

                  He created man for His glory and for His pleasure (Revelations 4:11)

CHAPTER SEVEN

Lois, Jasmine, and Hairy did some serious brainstorming about evil in the world. They decided that the worst kind of evil was the hidden, insidious kind that is fostered by apparently “good” but ignorant people of science and religions. These people generate hatred which destroys cooperation between people and nations. The result is the creation of the worst kinds of evil such as: discrimination, murder and war. Science ridicules religions. The various religions criticize science. And each of the religions feels that all the other religions are not the correct religion.

Hairy decided to focus their attention on eliminating the hidden and insidious kinds of evil that exist in the world. He knew that education was helpful but it could not accomplish their goal of cooperation without some help. A hidden force for good was needed. He decided to create a hidden force which would help to promote and encourage good in the world. He figured it would take about a week to come up with the answer. He suggested that they should meet again next week so that he could explain and implement his world changing plan.

To Be continued…

                                      

                                    MAYBE A GUARDIAN ANGEL IS NEEDED

CHAPTER SIX

The Hairy Risk Taker School of Tap Dancing And Guide To Finding The Meaning Of Life became successful but one of its graduates, a newspaper reporter from the New York Times, questioned its ability to fight evil in the world as was promised by Hairy when he came out of retirement. The crack reporter, Lois Lane, pointed out that, “Sure, I can dance well and I can philosophize as well as Plato but I have not seen any reduction of evil in the world.”

Jasmine Loverly said, “You know, Hairy, she is right. We have produced some terrific bull shitters who can dance like Sammy Davis Junior but we have done nothing to reduce evil. We should get back on track and fulfill your promise of fighting evil.”

Hairy said, "Damn it. I was having so much fun that I forgot to stick with our goal. Hokay, Here is what we will do. Our graduate crack investigative reporter will be designated as our bird dog to sniff out evil so that we can deal with it. Lois, are you willing to do that?”

Lois said, “I would be honored to accept your challenge. I am thrilled to become a member of your team of evil fighters.” And so the hunt began…

CHAPTER FIVE

After being sued by the American College of Cardiologist and Transplant Surgeons, Hairy was forced to admit that performing heart transplant surgery at home was a bad idea. He was forced to terminate his web page and go back to looking for ways to fight evil.

Hairy launched a poetry contest for a poem that could be dedicated to fighting evil in America. The following poem won the top prize:

Unburn the boat, rebuild the bridge,

Reconsecrate the sacrilege,

Unspill the milk, decry the tears,

Turn back the clock, relive the years

Replace the smoke inside the fire,

Unite fulfillment with desire,

Undo the done, gainsay the said,

Revitalize the buried dead,

Revoke the penalty and clause,

Reconstitute unwritten laws,

Repair the heart, untie the tongue,

Change the faithless old to hopeful young,

Inure the body to desease

And help me to replace Obama please!

My apologies to the poet Duncan Forbes

CHAPTER FOUR

During Pierre’s first dance lesson, Jasmine noticed that he was staring at her neck while his eyes turned red and his teeth became fangs. She immediately recognized him for what he was. As he lunged at her throat, she deftly kicked him in the chest, burying the high heel of her dance instructor’s shoe in his heart. He instantly collapsed to the floor and became a pile of Transylvania dirt. She swept up his remains and flushed him down the toilet_ Thus ended the Vampire’s attempt at destroying Hairy Risk Taker.

Meanwhile, Hairy was busy designing a web page for older American men with heart trouble. The site’s name is, “DO IT YOURSELF HEART TRANSPLANTS”. It promises to show how heart transplant surgery can be easily performed at home using basic power tools, aquarium tubing and a bottle of single malt scotch. It was a fine effort by Hairy to help men enjoy a longer life.

To be continued...

CHAPTER THREE

Pierre Margolle is a man with evil ancestors. He is a descended of Count Dracula. Yes, I am serious. Pierre is a modern day vampire with a grudge against Hairy who, once upon a time, drove a stake through the heart of Pierre’s uncle, Count Sucker of Transylvania. Pierre’s plan was to suck the blood out of beautiful Jasmine Loverly. Then,she would turn into a vampire who could be controlled by Pierre. He would make Jamine murder the world’s most famous tap dancer. Pierre  disguised himself as a wanna be tap dancer and enrolled in Hairy’s School of Tap Dancing And Guide To Finding The Meaning Of Life. He requested Jasmine as his instructer. He figured it would be easy to bite her neck while they were dancing.

To be continued...

CHAPTER TWO

In order to set up the curriculum for their school of philosophy, Hairy and Jasmine collaborated on defining the meaning of life. It was not an easy task as evidenced by the fact that there was not a common definition of the meaning of life in the entire world. Jasmine liked Pablo Picasso’s, “The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.”  Hairy thought Pablo’s definition was too simple and not suitable for a uniform definition of ‘The Meaning’ that would be acceptable by everyone. After much thinking and brainstorming, they settled on the following: “There are an infinite number of meanings if you are fortunate enough to have life. The gift of life does not come with a readymade ‘Meaning’. Life is meaningful in a different way for each individual. You must choose your own meaning. The choices are limitless, such as survival, procreation, to love and be loved, search for truth, leave the world a better place, have fun, enjoy the journey, look for the best way to spend your time on earth, etc. etc. etc.

Meanwhile and I do mean mean, Pierre Margolle, the mean and evil rumba dancer, was thinking up ways to destroy Hairy’s dream of doing some good in the world. He had a secret reason for hating Hairy Risk Taker and he would not tell anyone what it was_ not even his dance partner.

To be continued...