If your neighborhood bar waters down your drinks, it is a violation of trust and a form of bartender malpractice. Bartenders have a sacred obligation to their customers that is similar to the relationship of a psychiatrist to his patients. He should be trying to help you feel better, not stealing from you. Charging for a drink that is not all there is tantamount to stealing. It is a crime and crime is evil so Hairy set out to eliminate it!

Hairy recruited two professional bartenders to assist him in his endeavor. Not only were Tina and Tarina famous bartenders, they were also beautiful women who were highly effective bodyguards for Hairy. They met at Hairy’s favorite neighborhood bar to plan their campaign: